It’s been 21 years since you departed this world to the great beyond and it got me thinking and remembering back to my late father and how we also shared a lot of bonding through his life time philosophy, farming and teaching career.
I knew the pain of losing my dad will perhaps never leave me. I imagine it will ease with time and I process and get through it, but I don’t suspect I will get over it. How can I? How can i get over a person who has been there since before I was even aware of myself?
The life of my dad, his influence, his energy is inextricably linked to mine and I now take comfort in that. I take comfort in knowing that my dad is no longer in pain. That suffering is no longer something he has to endure.
My dad, Adebisi Adejola will forever be in my heart until the day it stops breathing and I am grateful that I am becoming a more fully realized human being, a more caring, compassionate, and empathetic person because of my dad. Still, I would forfeit any wisdom for the sake of having him back.
I lost my dad on 8th May, 2000 as a teen but I am fully aware that I lost you only in body, not in the spirit. This is by far the most painful and heart-breaking, heart-ripping and life-altering experience I have endured even as a teen but I do my best to remain grateful and comforted knowing how much my beloved dad positively affected the lives of others.
He was the most sincerely altruistic person I have ever known with no attachment to material things – he would literarily give you the clothes he was wearing. All you had to do was mention you liked something and he would immediately insist on giving it to you.
How many times did I have to tell my dad, “No, I don’t need anything, Dad, I am good, Keep it for yourself.”
My dad loved to dance, farm and loved to make people laugh. All he ever wanted to do was make other people feel comfortable and make sure they were not feeling left out. I know it’s because he knew what it was like to feel left out.
My dad left an impact on every person he met even as a church steward, even strangers (who didn’t stay strangers very long because he was just so damn friendly). The love my dad spread on this earth continues to grow and will live on, and that is the ultimate measure of my human being.
Exactly this day twenty-one years ago, he passed on even when he was planning to do his house fencing and called on the contractor and slumped while he was handing over the money meant for his house fencing, we pour water on him to revive his soul and with immediate effect rushed him to the nearest hospital for comprehensive medical attention but all efforts were lost as my dad said goodbye to this world before getting to the hospital.
Even though I knew something was wrong with him the moment he looked at my face when I visited him during school break time the same day he left.
He said, “son, make sure you abide by my teaching and outshine my person, live life as simple as you could, don’t get too attached with material things and see rendering assistance and making people smile your life philosophy.”
He added, “be the light unto the world and pursue anything that you feel comfortably attached to as there lies your honor.”
But as a teenager, I don’t know it would come so soon. I was hoping I would have more time to get acquainted with the idea of death and what it means for those of us left behind.
Now, I am beginning to understand just how naïve my existence was before I was forced to comfort death’s discourteous blow.
Not only was my dad gone around 3:30pm on Monday 8th May, 2000, but a best friend, a mentor, and my hero. the man that would sit us down to watch NTA news at 4pm.
My dad ended up being my hero in life, and I am thankful that he was a good enough person for me to call him that. I am also grateful for every memory we shared, news related or not.
My only hope is that I can be as good person as him, so that I can get up to heaven, and see him again someday.
Dad, I know you are up in heaven and I love you and miss you very much and still think about you this day. I only hope you are very proud of your son, who is doing his best in life to keep your memory alive.
It’s been twenty-one years that you died, many would recall how good you were.
When you were alive, you were greatly celebrated. In death, how many of people can honor you?
At the flimsiest of excuses, many who benefited from your good deeds and benevolence have since abandoned your cause, how many people now remember that you had children? How many of those that you tutored and mentored now know what has become of your children?
They have become successful and have since moved on. In any case, your Children: Toyosi, Adebowale, Adebola, Adegbenga, Adeyemi, Adekemi, Adeseun and Adedamilola that you left at one and half year is not doing badly.
Adebisi, in appraising your life and death, I learned among other things that goods should be done for the sake of GOD and not for the beneficiaries because in one’s absence, not many of the beneficiaries of one’s kind gestures will remember them.
When I woke up this morning and meditated over the lessons of your life and time, I decided to let go and also hope that others might feel aggrieved for whatever reason, rightly or wrongly.
“Dad, wherever you are, you are gone but you will never be forgotten. The loss of my father will always sting. But now, everything that I do is in honor of him and celebrates his life.”
“A great soul serves everyone all the time. A great soul never dies. It brings us together again and again.”
In the meantime, sleep on Adebisi omo Adebinu…
Adebisi Oooooooooo
Ijesa Modu Aponoda
Omo Eleni Ateka
Omo Eleni Ewele
Ijesa ki ri idi Isana
Ile ni eru baba wa ti mu ina r’oko
Ijesa Losin tolotolo,
Eru tiwa lo n sin pepeye
Omo Owa, Omo Ekun
Omo Olomi Meji Ajipon Ni isale odo
Okan Abumu, ekeji abuwe
Omo won ni idi aragba
Omo Adebimu orun re oooooooooooooooo
